My Testimony

Cody and I are so very Thankful for our children. I've never really discussed our journey to Twins, so today, I'm going to give you a synopsis. I should warn you that this post may be TMI for some, but I'm ready to share our story and my testimony.

In June of 2008, Cody and decided that we were ready to start a family. We stopped all forms of birth control and went on a nice relaxing vacation to Puerto Rico (we figured we would need it, because we would be parents soon). Little did we know, the road ahead was going to be a bumpy one. After I stopped taking the pill nothing happened and by nothing I mean no period or ovulation. We waited and waited. I charted my basal body temperature, used ovulation predictors (OPK's) and every other thing you could think of to help the fertility process. Several of our friends became pregnant during this time. I'm not sure if it was our deep desire for a baby that made us notice EVERYTHING related to babies or if it really was everywhere. I started feeling sad, bitter, and emotional about everything. I prayed and prayed that we would get pregnant.

In October in an attempt to let my body regulate itself without the use of medications, we tried accupuncture for 12 bi-weekly sessions. At the beginning of November and my second to last accupuncture treatment, I started. WOO HOO. We were so excited. That excitement soon turned to heartache when the time of the month approached in December and nothing happened. I wasn't pregnant and hadn't started.

I called my OBGYN and scheduled an appointment. They would see me the end of December. I met with my doctor and explained everything. He told me it sounded like I had Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and gave me a shot of Progesterone to initiate a cycle and said sometimes it "resets" the body. He also told me "that it takes a 'healthy' average couple 6 mos to a year to conceive". I had read that...I had read everything. I was hopeful. I charted diligently and tested. January came and went....nothing happened. Two more shots of a higher dose of progesterone, several blood tests and a Hysterosalpingogram test later, we were in the month of March and it was determined that I had PCOS and I was not ovulating.

Emotionally, I was distressed. I'm not sure how Cody was able to handle me, because I was an anger ball. I was mad, sad, disappointed, frustrated, happy, tired, persistant, defeated and heartbroke. At this point, I felt that "trying" was pointless because I wasn't ovulating and there was no "chance" of getting pregnant. I convinced myself that I would be happy with a mere chance and I prayed for that.

I was mad at God. I prayed and prayed to conceive and it wasn't happening. Of course, I did the "why me?" and shook my fist at my God. My anger soon turned to despair and I realized that I could no longer handle the situation on my own. My emotions were getting the best of me and I had to let go and let God.

I started a prayer journal. Each day I would pick a bible verse that related to a certain emotion I was feeling and I would write about it. I thought this would be an awesome way to track my journey and to have something that I could show my kids in the future. In my journal, I prayed, discussed and really conversed with God.

The story I'm about to tell took me by surprise. I'm not one that really believes in signs or things to that affect, but something happened during my journaling that changed my attitude and my journey.

On Tuesday, March 24th I wasn't feeling any particular feeling so I did the ole close your eyes, flip to a page, point and read trick.  (What?  You don't do that?)  =)

The first verse that I stumbled upon was Judges 13:5 "Because you WILL conceive and give birth to a son" I read the words over again and laughed to myself. Cody was standing in the kitchen and I read the verse to him and said wasn't it funny that I would happen upon that verse. I decided it was a fluke and I didn't feel like writing about that so I was going to pick another verse.

I closed my eyes flipped and pointed to Genesis 18:13-14 "Then the Lord said to Abraham, 'why did Sarah laugh and say will I really have a child now that I am old?'  'Is there anything too hard for the Lord?'  I will return to you at the appointed time next year and Sarah will have a son."

I still get chills to this day.  I was called out...by name no less.  Needless to say, I journaled about those verses.  Call it strange coincidence, but I call it amazing grace.  My hope/faith was renewed and I was ready to face my fertility journey. Bring on the rain! 

After researching my condition and presenting a very convincing argument to my doctor, he agreed to let us try a fertility treatment.  Usually, fertility meds aren't prescribed until you have been unsuccessful after a year of trying to conceive.  We were at 10 months and I was adamant that we try something since I wasn't ovulating and I needed a chance!  He informed us of the risks of the fertility drug Clomid (mainly ovarian cysts, irritability, mood swings).  He also told us that it would increase our chance of having twins by 10% (I call that a reward not a risk).  A normal person has around a 5% chance of having twins, so ultimately we would have a 15% chance of having twins.

We tried Clomid in April. I took one small white pill once a day for 5 days, charted my temperatures and used OPK's.  Holy Moly!  I got a positive OPK.  That was the first time I had ever seen a positive on one of those tests.  I prayed that we would get pregnant and if not, that I would at least cycle normally so that we could try again the next month.  A week later, I started feeling really light headed when I stood up and working out was making me exhausted.  I had read that Clomid side effects can mimic those of pregnancy, so I wasn't about to get my hopes up.  This, of course, was only my first round of clomid and though I only prayed for a chance...it couldn't happen that fast.

Wednesday, April 29th; I took a pregnancy test...no surprise I'm not pregnant.  I don't tell Cody about the test, because it was a few days too early to test.  (I'm impatient okay?  You know it, I know it...blah blah blah)  Saturday, May 2nd; Cody and I lay in bed together talking about whether or not I should test (again).  He knows me too well and finally said, "if you don't test your just going to sit here and worry about it."  I go to the bathroom and take a test...nothing happens.  I'm about to walk into the bedroom when I notice a faint positive.  No way...not after 1 dose of Clomid.  I quickly grab another brand and take another test (at this point I was a pee stick connoisseur..I had EVERY brand people)  This one was even more visibly positive than the first. 

I had thought of several neat ways to tell Cody he was going to be a daddy, but none of them happened.  I walked out of the bathroom shaking and said "You're going to be a daddy".  Cody, who was laying face down on the bed, lifted his head and said "Are you joking with me?"  I told him I would not joke about that and he jumped up and hugged me so close.  (I found out later he was laying face down praying over and over.."Please let Sarah be pregnant")

We were elated.  At Eight Weeks ...we found out we were having twins.  Fast forward to December of 2009 and we had two beautiful, perfect babies in our arms.  So a year after reading that verse...I not only gave birth to a son but I also had a daughter.  Prayers more than fulfilled!  Hallelujah!  We are so grateful!

We tell our children all the time how much we love them.  I can't wait to share with them that they are living proof that prayers do get answered.  Not only do they have a wonderful father here on Earth, but a heavenly father that will always see that they get exactly what they WANT NEED!

Thank you for sharing in my journey...

"Be still and know that I am God"  - Psalm 46:10